I like Winter........

No, not really.....what follows is an email one of my wife's friends sent her yesterday.

Aug. 12 - Moved into our new home in northern Ohio. It is so beautiful here. The lake is so picturesque. I have a beautiful old maple tree in my front yard. Can hardly wait to see the change in the seasons. This is truly God's Country.

Oct. 14 - Ohio is such a gorgeous place to live, one of the real special places on Earth. The leaves are turning a multitude of different colors. I love all of the shades of reds, oranges and yellows, they are so bright. I want to walk through all of the beautiful hills and spot some white tail deer. They are so graceful, certainly they must be the most peaceful creatures on Earth. This must be paradise.

Nov. 11 - Deer season opens this week. I can't imagine why anyone would want to shoot these elegant animals. They are the very symbol of peace and tranquility here. I hope it snows soon. I love it here!

Dec. 2 - It snowed last night. I woke to a wonderful sight: everything covered in a beautiful blanket of white. The maple tree is magnificent. It looks like a postcard. We went out and swept the snow from the steps and driveway. The air is so crisp, clean and refreshing. We had a snowball fight. I won, and the snowplow came down the street. He must have gotten too close to the driveway, because we had to go out and shovel the end of the driveway again. What beautiful place. Nature in harmony. I love it here!

Dec. 12 - More snow last night. I love it! The plow did his cute little trick again. What a rascal. A winter wonderland. I love it here!

Dec. 19 - More snow - couldn't get out of the driveway to get to work in time. I'm exhausted from all of the shoveling. And that snowplow!

Dec. 21 - More of that white shit coming down. I've got blisters on my hands and a kink in my back. I think that the snowplow driver waits around the corner until I'm done shoveling the driveway. Asshole.

Dec. 25 - White Christmas? More freakin' snow. If I ever get my hands on the son of a bitch who drives that snowplow, I swear I'll castrate him. And why don't they use more salt on these roads to melt this crap??

Dec. 28 - It hasn't stopped snowing since Christmas. I have been inside since then, except of course when that SOB "Snowplow Eddie" comes by. Can't go anywhere, cars are buried up to the windows. Weather man says to expect another 10 inches. Do you have any idea how many shovelfuls 10 inches is??

Jan.1 - Happy New Year? The way it's coming down it won't melt until the 4th of July! The snowplow got stuck down the road and the shithead actually had the balls to come and ask to borrow a shovel! I told him I'd broken 6 already this season.

Jan. 4 - Finally got out of the house. We went to the store to get some food and a damn deer ran out in front of my car and I hit the bastard. It did $3,000 in damage to the car. Those beasts ought to be killed. The hunters should have a longer season if you ask me.

Jan. 27 - Warmed up a little and rained today. The rain turned the snow into ice and the weight of it broke the main limb of the maple tree in the front yard and it went through the roof. I should have cut that old piece of shit into fireplace wood when I had the chance.

May 10 - Took my car to the local garage. Would you believe the whole underside of the car is rusted away from all of that damn salt they dump on the road? Car looks like a bashed up, heap of rusted cow shit.

May 23 - Sold the car, the house, and moved to Florida. I can't imagine why anyone in their freakin' mind would ever want to live in the Godforsaken State of Ohio.

My lovely wife was raised in a suburb of Cleveland Ohio and moved here at age 14.

I remember when we first started dating that her dad still had one of his cars from when they lived in Cleveland.....most of the bottom 3rd of the car was rusted away.

If I had the choice of where to live in the USA...Cleveland wouldn't be very high on my list. Actually....it wouldn't be on my list.

Cheney dunk tank raises 800 million dollars.

Speaking of Cheney......here's an asshole detector. (sorta not safe for work-has pictures of blurry assholes)

till later.