Thursday, August 27, 2009

Some folks are thick.............

So, a large framed customer (the guy was really, really fat) walks up to the counter last night and asks me if donuts have a lot of calories.

My first thought was to ask him if he was high.

Thought better of that and told the guy that yes, donuts are probably one of the worst things you can eat if you're watching what you eat.

He seemed satisfied with that answer.....and then proceeded to buy a dozen donuts. Oooookay. Let's face it-not many skinny people eat donuts.
One of my friends at work has Downs Syndrome. He doesn't let that get in his way of putting in 100% effort every night he comes to work.....there are lots of folks that are "normal" that don't have nearly the work ethic that Brian does.

My favorite saying he has is "shut up and get to work" ....ya gotta like a guy like that. He doesn't complain, he doesn't explain...he just smiles and works his ass off.
It always amazes me how some folks are complete assholes when they think they are anonymous on the internet.


Yeah, on rare occasions I'll be an asshole, but I always try to do it in feels better that way and you get to see the look on someones face when you call them out. I think I might be a confrontation addict.
Madonna doesn't get it....nobody gives a shit about what she thinks-they paid for a ticket to hear her sing, not listen to a lecture.
Why is this news? You know my opinion-Jon and Kate need to suck it up for the next 10 years or so and finish raising their kids.
Anybody watching The Real Housewives of Atlanta? I like the other locations the show has been to but I can't stand listening to I'm skipping this run.
People of Wal-Mart.....yeah, I've seen a few of these folks.

till later.

Tuesday, August 25, 2009

Back to school...

Our son starts 11th grade on Wednesday. One question.....what's up with starting school before Labor Day?

Being somewhat old school, I think this is a dumbass idea.

If I was would start the week after Labor Day and run 5 1/2 days a week until May 1st with one week off at Christmas.

The best part of being a kid is having summers off.

I know when I was a kid, summer was the time to get part time jobs mowing yards, paper routes and I also worked at an auction house from age 12 to age 16 every Saturday.

I did all that stuff and still had plenty of time to have fun and get into trouble....just ask my mom.

I got one of those fancy Blackberry's.....I'm getting to the point where I have to check my schedule before I make appointments....I'm absent minding and I need something that beeps at me when I need to be somewhere.....ain't technology great?

I was setting up my mom's laptop so she gets all of her e mail from her different accounts sent to Windows Mail......jeez, all you have to do is miss one port setting and nothing works right. Hopefully, I have it done correctly (after several attempts) and ....Mom, if you're reading this-feel free to chip in and tell everyone what a wonderful son I am.

My pop is wearing one of those portable heart monitors for a month, the docs are looking for an irregular old man is one tough Irish guy-he said they ain't gonna find any problems. Alrightly then dad...just listen to the doctors....we'd like you to stick around for awhile.

Wow...this whole Michael Jackson thing won't die (see what I did there?) My opinion? It's a sad tale starting from the time the dude burned all his hair off filming a Pepsi commercial and it went downhill from there. He was one strange guy.

I'm waiting for a better program. I want the government to replace my Chrysler minivan with another Chrysler product for free since they are pretty much owned by the government. Then I'd sell the new vehicle. I have no idea what made me buy a Chrysler product but never again....I'm sticking with Subies from now on.

I'm one of those Libertarian nutjobs, so I didn't vote for Obama but his party has the edge in both the Senate and the House of Representatives......why isn't anything getting done? The Democrats continue to find new ways to lose. I'm sure it ain't this simple, but if I was President, I'd call each and every Democrat to the Oval Office, get about 2 inches away from them and read them the riot act. They are gonna piss away the next year and get squat accomplished.

What do I know, all I do is make donuts and fix computers.....and shoot my mouth off.

till later.

Sunday, August 23, 2009

Back to normal....

Our daughter is back at college, our son starts 11th grade this week and fall is just around the corner. In 6 or 7 months....our son will be driving the green monster to school and dad will be able to hit the sack right away when he comes home from donut duty at 5:30 AM.


Not too sure about my diet. All I know is that I gotta take it just a touch more serious. Dumb and fat ain't no way to go through life. What kills me is when I come home in the morning and want to inhale the entire contents of the refrigerator.

I have 4 perfectly good bikes.....maybe I oughta ride one of them once and awhile.

till later.

Thursday, August 20, 2009

YouTube - The Talking Goat

Wow, that goat has HUGE balls.....and it talks.

YouTube - The Talking Goat

Organizing for America

I think I'll sneak some of these ringtones onto my father-in-laws phone.....

Organizing for America |

Sure hope he has a sense of humor.

Lindy Hop Showdown

I could do that....not.

Lindy Hop Showdown

Pink Floyd members discuss recording "Money"

YouTube - Pink Floyd members discuss recording "Money"

Can I get a "Hell yeah?"

One of the first albums I bought when I was a kid.

If you listen to Lil probably have no idea what the hell I'm talking about.

Wednesday, August 19, 2009

Button rage...........

One of my long time clients called me up...she was having trouble working the remote control for her DVD player. If I was the guy designing remote controls-I'd have an on/off button, a channel up/down button, a mute button and a volume button.

The rest of the controls?

I'd figure something out....

Her remote control has at least 2 dozen buttons...all with teeny tiny writing that's all but undecipherable to my 50 year old eyes. My client is a few years older then me and she was a little frustrated.

To get the DVD player to work, you need to push a button on the TV remote and then push the same button again within 2 seconds to select your viewing source...none of the viewing sources are tagged "DVD" Once we had that figured out, the DVD player has it's own remote with about 900 tiny little buttons.

Both the TV and the DVD player are made by Sony.......somebody at Sony needs their ass kicked.

If I could figure a way to make a universal remote with large easily understandable buttons....I'd be able to retire on the profits.

till later.

PS-My business partner (our son) turned 16 yesterday. To say I'm proud of him would be a huge understatement. He's pretty much got his stuff together and has his head screwed on's gonna be fun watching him as he finishes growing up.

My wife and I have great kids.

Tuesday, August 18, 2009

Jenny Sanford Talks About Husband’s Affair - The Caucus Blog -

Some guys never learn.....never let the little head do the thinking for the big head.

The guy is leaving a beautiful smart wife and their kids for a floozie in another country.

The dude must be mentally ill...Mrs Sanford gets kudos in my book for wanting to reconcile. She's a way better person then I am.

Jenny Sanford Talks About Husband’s Affair back to work last night after a 4 day weekend....working for a living sucks. On the bright side, my consulting business is doing well enough to help pay some household bills....I'm digging that bigtime.

till later.

Friday, August 14, 2009

Mmmmmmmm steak.

As predicted.....Mike cleaned me out of my 20 bucks at poker on Thursday night. Never gamble with more money then you are willing to kiss goodbye. Heck, the way I look at it...$20 bucks was worth it for an evening of entertainment with the boys and............

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Couple of things you might notice....

-There's enough meat for 4 people...only 2 of us.

-Mike uses REAL charcoal to cook meat-tasted awesome.

-The grill screen is never cleaned-natural anti-stick

All I gotta say is Mike is one helluva cook. The man knows how to cook meat....crispy on the outside and tender and BLOODY on the inside...and he makes one mean Hollindaise sauce.

Today is the first day I've had off from work in 12 days straight. The celebrate (other than playing poker last night) I'm doing absolutely nothing. It's gonna be an effort to put on a shirt to go outside and check the mail. I'm 2 bottles into a 4 pack of wine coolers and it's only 2 in the afternoon.....looks like I'm staying home for the rest of the day.

I got our daughters car back from the shop...1900 bucks. New brakes, rotors, state inspection and a complete engine disassembly to replace every single gasket in the engine. If it cost anywhere near that much to fix ever again....I'm gonna drive it through the front window of my mechanics garage. It's always something but over the long's still cheaper then a new car.

Here's an example of how money can screw you up. I say let the guy get on with his life. He paid his debt to society..I don't particularly like the dude-but he deserves a second's not like he drank a 5th of Jim Beam and swerved into a minibus full of kids and killed them all or something. Killing dogs isn't exactly sterling human behavior...but he coulda done worse.

Pretty soon....the Japanese will all be as fat as Americans.

Wanna blow smoke up someone's ass? Here's the tool to do it with.

till later.

Thursday, August 13, 2009

New computer time...

Not for me......the client I was talking about yesterday.

Coulda been worse, the computer that I replaced was almost 10 years old-it was due. No biggie, I had a back up less then 24 hours old. I just transfered all his stuff and I was in bed by 1 PM. Didn't have the time to remove all the crapware yet....I'll do that sometime next week.

Yay for me.

The only casualty was my bike ride with my friend Mike....fortunately he's an understanding friend- I'm sure he'll thank me by taking all my money at poker later tonight....

Anybody got a few spare hundred thousand bucks?

I wanna do something like this. I have the technical skills and the sense of humor to pull it off. Unfortunately, our area is flooded with donut shops and most folks around here probably aren't ready to pay a dollar for donut. It would be a lot of hours but I like being creative.....maybe I'll post up some of my wilder creations...

Stay back 100 feet.......I'm just like a firetruck. My lovely wife made me an entire batch of chili before she left for the beach. I've had it for my last 3 meals. (Breakfast, lunch and dinner)

Yesterday a client's computer shit the hope I don't.

Sometimes I don't think very much before I eat stuff.

Seriously....shut the hell up. If she was an ugly old white guy instead of a leggy attractive woman....nobody would give a shit what she's saying.

till later.

Wednesday, August 12, 2009

Back up, back up, back up.

Heading out to a client who has a server that shit the bed.

I'm pretty sure it's terminal....I've had problems with this box in the past.

I'm just glad I talked them into buying a portable hard drive that backs up nightly and off site storage that does the same as well.

Worst case scenario is that he'll be out a few hundred bucks for a new computer.

till later.

Tuesday, August 11, 2009

miley1.jpg (JPEG Image, 588x900 pixels)

Miley Cyrus, a stripper pole and pink flamingos.....seriously.

miley1.jpg (JPEG Image, 588x900 pixels)

What to do...........

I'm almost at the end of a 12 day straight period of work.

Since my family is in Myrtle's the donut guy gonna unwind? One word.....


Yup, gonna spend 30 dollars of the family budget on a little poker Thursday night. Every time I play, I get a little better-who knows....maybe one of these days I'll win a game.

I'm also being a total slacker when I'm not working or fixing computers...the grass really, really needs cut but instead of using some of my free time on Wednesday morning to do it....screw it, I'm going for a bike ride with my buddy Mike.

The grass will still be there when I get around to riding is a serious business.

till later.

Saturday, August 08, 2009

Facebook | Sarah Palin: Statement on the Current Health Care Debate

Sarah is off her G.D. rocker.

Does she realize Medicare is managed by the government? While it ain't's better then nothing.

What's scarier is all the people that think she's on to something talking about "death panels". I just hope she makes a complete ass of herself before the elections roll around again so she has no chance of getting anywhere near Washington DC.

She's friends with Michele Bachman, who thinks the Earth is 7000 years old.

Facebook | Sarah Palin: Statement on the Current Health Care Debate


YouTube - Mastodon - Cut You Up With a Linoleum Knife

They should play this before ALL movies.

YouTube - Mastodon - Cut You Up With a Linoleum Knife

My family deserted me......

It's only for a week, they went to Myrtle Beach with my sister-in-law.

What do I have planned for the week?




Work on computers.

Ride my bike.

That oughta keep me busy....

til later.

Thursday, August 06, 2009

Wal-Mart pisses me off.........

Were we live is home to the number 1 Wal-Mart (in sales) in the country. My son and I were just there at 7:15 this morning to buy a few odds and ends......34 registers and one damn cashier and a huge line.

We dumped our stuff and headed down the road. Why the hell they have so many registers....I'll never know-I don't think I've ever been there and seen them all open at once.

In other news....gonna be headed out for some mountain biking for sure in Sunday. My buddy Mike has a new sweetie and she's never been out on the dirt.

I hope I can keep up with her....she's a skinny little thing and in about a month when she gets a little experience-she's probably gonna be able to kick my ass.

I'm sure she'll do fine, in deference to her and Mike and my lack of dirt riding this year...we are gonna be taking it extremely easy. I might even bring a camera along and take a few pics...Redman is my favorite place to mountain bike.

I've had a slightly pinched nerve or something in my shoulder going on for about a week...not that big a deal except I'm having a heck of a time getting to sleep....just can't get comfortable.

My pop gave me a couple of his painkillers and I'm sure one of those will do the trick. In fact, I took one about a half hour ago and I'm starting to get tired now so I think I'll go be unconscious for a few hours.

Tuesday, August 04, 2009

Ever feel............

Like this after a bike ride?

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Did the Rail Rail on Sunday with my buddy Mike, his sweetie and a couple other good friends. I think we did something like 10 or 12 miles and had a nice rest stop half way and I had a quite yummy iced coffee mocha slushy with whipped creme.

I probably balanced out my calorie intake with the miles I pedaled but the best news was that I had no extra knee pain the next day.

If you need a good cocktail idea...mix equal parts of diet peach Fresca and grapefruit juice with a shot of the cheapest whiskey you can find (I'm not a whiskey connoisseur). It's not like I'm a drunk or anything, I allow myself 2 cocktails on my evening off every week....good stuff.

This upcoming weekend...looks like we'll be doing a little mild off-roading down at Lake Redman. It'll be the first time this year my mountain bike has been in the dirt...should be fun.

till later.